I sit here and write this post tonight with mixed emotions and a heavy heart. Yesterday, we admitted my precious Grandmother into the Hospice House to spend her final days on this earth. She has fought and battled long and hard for the past four years. She received the diagnosis of stomach cancer at the end of 2010. She had a major surgery to remove most of it in February of 2011 and has been on chemo ever since. She is one amazing woman who I admire so much for her strength, courage and will to press on!
She is not only beautiful on the outside, but even more so on the inside. She and my Grandfather have been the cornerstone and backbone of the Henderson family! I have so many precious memories of being at their house and spending time her and them. She could cook up a storm and loved doing it. And we loved eating it!! We've had holidays at their house every year for as long as I can remember. She has been such an amazing source of encouragement and wisdom. You always know that Grandma will be praying for you!! She's always been so proud of her children, her grandchildren, and her family!
Through many, many rounds of chemo, she has fought, and fought hard! Always giving everything to the Lord!
Her strength and spirit never cease to amaze me.
Papa and Grandma have been married for nearly 59 years. What a testament of true love they are!
It breaks my heart more than anything to know that she will not meet our precious little boy on this side of heaven. But I take comfort in knowing the joy that he has already brought her. She has prayed for us for so long to have a baby and knew the struggle we went through with infertility for two years. She would always ask me about my appointments and I could always rest assured that she was praying for our precious child that we would one day have!
The joy on her face when we announced that we were pregnant was truly priceless! She was so happy and knew that the Lord had answered our prayers!
The look on her face below is priceless! She had been wanting us to have boy (and wore blue that night as her guess) and was right!! We are having a little boy, and naming his middle name after my Grandfather, William! She was so happy and it fills my heart with joy to see this picture and remember this night!
A few weeks ago, before she got really sick, Grandma told me that she wanted to buy Mason his bassinet. And she also told Cathy that she wanted her to get him an outfit. This is the outfit that was given to our sweet boy from her and he was given a bassinet from the two of them. Two items that I will cherish forever!
As we prepare to say Goodbye to my Grandma, and welcome our precious son into this world within months of one another, my heart is full...full of sadness and full of joy! Full of grief and full of rejoicing! I never knew you could have such extreme emotions, all at this same time! And though my Grandmother will not see this precious face on this side of heaven, I'm so thankful in God's promises that she will see him again, one day, and we will all be reunited together!
Grandma, we love you more than you could ever imagine. We thank you for all that you have ever done for us, all that you have taught us and most of all, for the love you've shown us. We thank you for always being that example of a Godly woman. Thank you for always encouraging us, having faith in us, and above all, praying for us! You can rest assured that Mason will know about you and love you, just as we do! And as we prepare to say not Goodbye, but "See You Later," I pray peace and comfort over you! Praying that the Lord surround you with His presence, and take all of your pain away!
About three weeks ago, we had a family cookout. And at that cookout, my Grandma and Papa recorded a book for Mason, entitled "Wherever You are, my love will find You." They each read a page, and though Grandma had to repeat after me, the sound of her sweet voice reading to my precious son is priceless gift, that I'll treasure forever!
"Wherever You Are, my Love will find You"
I wanted you more
than you ever will know,
so I sent love to follow
wherever you go.
It's high as you wish it.
It's quick as an elf.
You'll never outgrow it...
it stretches itself!
So climb any mountain...
climb up to the sky!
My love will find you.
My love can fly!
Make a big splash! Go out on a limb!
My love will find you. My love can swim!
It never gets lost, never fades, never ends...
if you're working,
or playing,
or sitting with friends.
You can dance 'til you're dizzy,
paint til you're blue...
There's no place, not one, that my love can't find you.
And if someday you're lonely,
or someday you're sad,
or you strike out at baseball,
or think you've been bad...
Just lift up your face, feel the wind in your hair.
That's me, my sweet baby, my love is right there.
In the green of the grass...in the smell of the sea...
in the clouds floating by...
at the top of a tree...in the sound crickets make at the end of the day...
"You are loved. You are loved. You are loved," they all say.
My love is so high, and so wide and so deep, it's always right there, even when you're asleep.
So hold your head high
and don't be afraid
to march to the front
of your own parade.
If you're still my small babe
or you're all the way grown,
my promise to you
is you're never alone.
You are my angel, my darling,
my star...and my love will find you,
wherever you are.
~"The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away. Blessed be the name of the Lord." Job 1:21~
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